Dear Eloise: A letter to my daughter

Dear Eloise,

Today is your first birthday.  It has been the most amazing year!

Before you were born, I was already a mommy.  Lincoln was 2 years old, and his entrance into the world had changed my life.  He had changed me.

Being a mom was a title I’d always longed for.  Since Lincoln is my first child, I thought I knew what it felt like to be a mom.  I felt like the person I was meant to be: the world made sense, I was so close to God, and I was incredibly happy.  I had no idea how to love someone else as much as I loved Lincoln.

Then I had you.

Eloise Grey, you shook my world upside down.  When you were born, and over the last year, you have shown me what being a mommy is. I am even closer to God than ever before.  I love Lincoln more profoundly than I ever knew I could.  I value your daddy more than ever.  And I love you so intensely.

You have taught me what true joy is.  You laugh at anything and everything, including yourself.  It is infectious.

You have taught me how to love with no limitations.  No matter how many times your brother hits you, takes away your toys, or ignores you, you continue to love and accept him with everything you are.

You have taught me that it is good to break the mold.  You love Link’s “boy” toys more than your own, and yet you always pick the girly-est dress in your closet to wear.

You have taught me to be fearless.  You would scale a cliff if I let you, and you test my patience and trust, and cause me more anxiety than Link ever has.  No matter how many grey hairs that causes, you are bettering me for it.

I never imagined that something that entered this world so quickly and just shy of seven pounds could change me to such a magnitude.

I love you, my sweet, beautiful, silly girl.  I can’t wait to see how else you change this world.


Your mommy