I have been a bit of a Scrooge this year as the holidays are approaching. I refuse (and I say that lightly) to listen to Christmas music. I don’t like or want the snow – not that I ever do. Plus I have no interest in shopping for people’s gifts. I think part of the problem may be that I am very focused on Lincoln, and all I want to do is things for him. This isn’t a bad thing. It’s just usually at this time of year I am doing things for me…
A typical Amber Christmastime: The season for me normally kicks off with the Cities Sampler release day. I immerse myself in the beautiful music while planning to start the Santa season. For the past seven years, I have spent ~5 weeks leading up to Christmas working with Santa. I have loved that job since day 1. Thanksgiving occurs, which stops the Sampler listening and begins the Christmas music. Then I spend many glorious days preparing my shopping lists, purchasing more gifts than necessary at higher amounts than needed, and I finish off wrapping these gifts. At work for the past 2 years I have helped plan the Christmas Party! I thoroughly enjoy heading to Grandma’s/Aunt’s/Nebraksa/Parents’ to open gift and spend family time. One thing you should also know about me, which shows why I love Christmas so much, is that my love language is Gifts.
This year is a bit different. I didn’t go to the release day because my wonderful bestest Nikki won tickets to the Sampler Listening Party where I was able to reserve my copies of the CD. Therefore on Nov. 17th I did not start listening to the Sampler. (I didn’t actually start listening until this week!) As Santa geared up, I did not. This year I am just doing the scheduling. While I have loved working with the people at Santa and have truly enjoyed holding this position for 8 years, I do not miss one bit of it. I am not on the Christmas Party committee this year. Thanksgiving came and went, along with a bit of snow. I enjoyed the family time, but did not enjoy the snow. I am fearful of driving with Lincoln in it. I am a very good driver, but other people are not. Christmas music has still not started. I haven’t purchased a gift – nor do I really want to. I love to give people gifts, but this year money is tighter, since having a baby is expensive, and I just worry.
Ultimately, the Christmas season will bring me great joy and cheer. I will buy the gifts that I need and want to buy. We are not strapped for money, we just need to watch more closely how we choose to spend. Alabaster will probably not be buying all of his kitty/dog/bird cousins a gift this year. And unlike most years, I could care less what I get for Christmas! All I want is for Lincoln to be happy and healthy, and to get the things that he needs.
So instead of being excited this year about my gift giving and receiving, or Christmas music, I am simply joyful towards life. I have an amazing family, an uber supportive work environment, and the husband and child that I have wanted for so long.
Christmas for me this year is a time to truly understand the gift that Jesus was and is. I have been blessed incredibly these last few months and I am happier than I ever have been. The holidays will be a time for me to share that joy and happiness with others as best I can, to do it for Lincoln and for God.