fairness

I hate it when my parents think that they are being fair. Especially my dad. He really isn’t, but he just doesn’t realize it. Sometimes I wish that he would just take a flying leap….

Eh…

So I am sitting here doing not much. I am at the high school. I came up here for lunch, and I am just hanging out til 2. I have key club after school, so it made the most sense. Anyways! My little Jack’s 6th birthday is today. It is exciting. Justin and I are going to his soccer game and then is his party. He is also having a ‘friends’ party at Drcula’s. A bowling game. So yes. I am bored… I have nothing else to say… Bye.

Evite

Amber’s 18th Birthday Party!!!

Who: Amber Radabaugh
What: Birthday Party
Where: Email me if you want to know.

When: November 1st, 2003 8pm-Midnight
Why: Why not?

Bring a friend! We will have snacks and some cake! Plus:

Hot Tub

Possible bonfire

Trampoline

Movies

DDR

Pool Table
Look! I made bullets! That is my birthday invite. Why don’t you all come?

…why…

I was thinking about Dan’s question about having an online diary. I have one so that I can keep track of my life. I also like keeping my readers up to date on my life. Plus, I like looking at my Nedstat and seeing that people from different countries are reading it. I love looking back on my days and reading my thoughts. I hope that maybe some of my thoughts are helping people. It would be nice to hear if they are. Email me?Dan said that he wanted to provide more interesting things for his readers. I often think that way when I post. But I have begun to not really care. Even if some entries are boring, people will still read them. I will admit that I often just skim people’s entries if they are super long. I always enjoy them though.I had a flu shot today. I hate these. Justin came and held my hand. It was nice of him, and I love him.I would like to learn more about computer stuff. What I mean is that I wish I new how to make my own layouts, and cool things on them. I would like to have a thing where I can email people whenever I update, if they sign up for this, or have my own ISMS. I would also love to learn how to use Flash movie thing maker. I want to have a movie to my page. But not that badly. If anyone knows a good site, or book, or software or something, that will help me learn how to create my own website stuff, I would greatly appreciate the tip. I should learn how to make a new layout any time I want all by myself so that I don’t bug Justin. My birthday is on November 2nd. I am having a party on the 1st at my house. You are all invited! Email me if you would like to come! Everyone is welcome. Some of you will receive invites, depending on how well my memory is when I send them out.Where can I find a job that I can make a good amount of money and that will be able to accomodate my school hours? I am in great need of money. My family is going downhill in the money situation. So I would like to earn money so that I can send myself through college, and maybe even help them get back on their feet. I doubt that I will be able to help though… I just wish that I had some incredible intelligence that is rare, so everyone would want me!I must get ready for work now. Oh happy day!

Luvs

I think that life will be good someday. People are able to get through tough times. My family is going to get back on their feet soon. I hope. But even though there are times of tears, we are all still together. Alex is having a good time lately. Things are going well for him. I pray that it continues. Nikki is going to go to a new college where she will find herself, so to speak. I hope that everything goes well for her.As for me… Someday, I will wake up next to the man I love. I will think about how today I get to make him breakfast. I will go to the doctor and see an ultrasound of my baby. When my love wakes up, he will kiss my stomach and tell his son (or daughter) to come out soon because we are anxiously waiting. I will read my article in the paper as I sit at the kitchen table. I will clumsily walk around my house picking up so it will look nice when my husband comes home. A bit later, I will have dinner on the stove when he comes home. He will come through the door, throw his briefcase down, and walk over to me. He will say, "Screw dinner!" I will be angry, because I worked so hard for him. But as he lays me down on our bed and kisses me, my anger will be gone. I will look into the eyes of my best friend. He will tell me how much he loves me and how he is so excited to spend the rest of his life together. With tears in my eyes, he will ask me what is wrong. "It’s time honey…" I will say. We will rush to the hospital to experience the birth of this life that we made. Completely made by us (and God!) with out the input of our family or friends. We will look at each other as I tell him how much I hate him for making me go through all of this pain, and that he will have to have the next one. And as we are gazing into each others’ souls, I will think about how my dream has come true.But someday is not today. Today is today. Someday will come. I need to learn to be patient though. I need to learn that I have to give it up to God and let him take control of my life. I need to learn to watch the clock when I am getting carried away in my dreams…. bye!